My shoelace broke. Tried to replace it, but turns out my shoes have a DRM mechanism, and will only accept genuine Cole Haan shoelaces with the right RFID tag. I could tie the broken ends back together, but reverse engineering the shoelace mechanism would be a violation of the DMCA, so I'd be breaking Federal Law. Cole Haan shoelaces are way overpriced (they use the shoe as a loss leader to sell laces), so..

I thought about buying a pair of Rockports instead, because they advertise "Standards Compliance" and an Open Shoelace Interface, but I have to give them my home address and a valid email with the purchase. I don't want to fight shoe-spam, bah.

So, finally I tried to put on an old pair of boots manufactured before shoes had proprietary interfaces, but they couldn't get traction on modern pavement. I'd modify the design, but the manufacturer went belly up a long time ago without releasing the specifications or schematics, so I'd have to pay an exorbitant fee to a "Legacy Engineer" for an adapter interface.

All this modern shoe technology, and I have no choice but to be barefoot.